One moment...

One moment... changes your life forever.

On Wednesday i got a call from my husbands co-worker. "Your husband has been in an accident. He got caught in a machine at work and an ambulance is taking him to the emergency room. He is in alot of pain", they warned.

That was the moment everything changed.

I had a marathon planned for today. Instead i am sunken away in the intesive care unit making sure my husbands kidneys don't shut down.

Crushed pelvis/hip and internal bleeding.

Pray and... take a run for me.

There will be no more running for a while.

Lots of love.

My first non-race

Okay, i'm just going to get it out there. I pulled out of the South Valley Half Marathon.

Do i feel guilty?
No.

Do i wish i ran it this morning?
Yes.

Is the world going to end if i pull out of a race and spend the day cleaning my house and going school shopping with my girls?
No.

Will i ever pull out of a race again.
Probably.

Do i need to sneak in a 10 miler this evening anyway.
You bet!

Saturday run and contemplations

12.5 miles through rough rocky trails, loose gravel hills, and rooted and windy switch backs. All the while, seeing the sunrise on the golden canyon walls.

Can a Saturday get any better than that? Not really.

I'm comtemplating...

1. Not running the South Valley Half (my upcoming week

is a nightmare and i will have to push my body beyond physical and mental limits to combine a 60 hour work week with running/training).

2. Seeing "Smurfs" with my girls today.

3. Eating a big piece of chicken, a slice of chocolate cake and then taking a nap.

4. Running Hope to Hobble marathon (non chipped) in 3 weeks. Yikes!

5. Cleaning out the garage.

6. Starting a savings acount for Christmas (it's never too early!)

Alternate

I am officially the alternate for the RedRock Relay in Septmber.

This morning at CrossFit, we were talking about the 186 mile course, and i asked if they had any alternates just in case someone got injured.

They actually needed one -and i thought, "What the heck!"

3 legs, anywhere from 4 to 13 miles. It sounds like fun.

Enjoying the little things

Livi on her new bike

Growing up in sunny California had it's upside. My childhood was magical. Chasing the ice-cream truck, eating a half melted push-up pop on the hot curb, watching Dukes of Hazards and Little House On The Prairie, and riding bikes until dusk with my big brother. Riding bikes was a huge part of my childhood.

That brings me to our new purchase for Livi... a new bike. A new bike for a 6 year old is like getting a new car for an adult. It's a big deal! I am so happy to be able to give my children the same things that made me happy in my childhood. Bikes, toys and treats... they are all great, but my favorite memories are when my mom whispered in my ear, "I love you -i will always love you."

A bike can't beat that!

Livi & Farrah

My Own Calcutta: Enjoying the simple things... like a new bike or an out-of-the-blue "I love you."

... Even Weeding The Garden

No energy... didn't want to wake up. Crawled under the covers when the alarm went off at 5:30 am, hit the snooze button and proceeded to dream about a lazy pancake Saturday morning with my girls and husband. THEN.. BOOM BOOM ... it hit me!

You know.. thee feeling. "Thee" feeling that all runners cherish when the alarm goes off and we contemplate the warm bed or running. As much as i love my husband and girls, the run pulls me out of bed and makes me brush my teeth, and forces me to put on my running clothes.

To make a long story short, it was a miracle. Last Saturday's run was a disaster... burning lungs, undefined pain, shortness of breath -actually no breath. In my mind i chalked it up to high elevation, but in my runners heart i thought i lost my endurance over my month long european vacation -everything i worked so hard for. I actually thought, i am unworthy of running because i am so bad at it. It was a turning point for me. A point where i thought, "Maybe i am in such bad shape, that i shouldn't run anymore??"

But, this particular mountain club run changed everything. It felt light. The hills filled my lungs with pain, but pain i knew. Runners pain. Not scary, "i can't breath" pain. It was wooooonderful! I felt like i was back in the game. I ran up the canyon with 4 magical girls, we ran towards the sunrise on a scary cliff, we got lost and took an adventurous 2 mile off road run on a windy bushy trail, and ended up back down the sunfilled canyon 12 miles later.

I ran 12 miles and loved every minute of it. Was it hard? YES - but bearable. So bearable, i can't wait for the next challenge.

Little did i know the next challenge was getting home by 9:00 am, making the girls a pancake breakfast and weeding the garden with my adorable husband and Livi.

My husband made my day when he smiled at me in wonder and said, "How can you run 12 miles in the mountains, fix pancakes and weed the yard with us for 2 hours?"

The only thing that came out was, "Because i love it." He shook his head in discernment.

What i ment to say was, "When i run, it intesifies life's other pleasures -even weeding the garden!"

My Own Calcutta: Regaining my confidence- feeling the good (running) pain again- spending the day in the garden with my girls and husband.

Soldier Hollow to Deer Creek Dam

Deer Creek Reservoir

Since i've returned from Denmark i have been under a pile of stress. I took a new position as an Early Childhood Director, but i couldn't let go of my current job as a Pre-K teacher, so i kept that one as well. In this economy i feel very blessed to have 2 jobs. Two wonderful jobs at that! But it's so stinkin' stressful. 

Even though i have been stressed out, I've been keeping up my CrossFit 3 times a week and getting in a few medium runs here and there, but nothing too impressive. Lately i've been feeling very winded and sluggish.

Saturday i went on my club run to Soldier Hollow and then on around Deer Creek to the dam. A gorgeous 9 mile run following the Heber Valley Railroad tracks. About 3 miles into the run i could not breath. My lungs stung, my heartfelt heavy, and my breathing was not normal. I couldn't even speak to my fellow runner. All in all, i felt like i was dying.

I hit the dam at mile 9 and called it a day. Everyone else complained of sluggishness too and chalked it up as "elevation problems". Then it hit me -oh my gosh it's the elevation!! I went home, did some research and found out Denmark has an elevation of 103ft and Soldier Hollow has a wopping 5,477ft!!!! No wonder i thought i was going to die.

Has anyone else had elevation issues at some point?? How long does it take to get back to normal?

Good Ol' USA

I am so happy to be back in the United States. I can't tell you how much fun it was to be in Denmark. My two girls said it was like being "home" again and for my marriage it was like a second honeymoon. That trip could never be replaced. But i also can't get over the excitment of being back in the US of A. We have it pretty good here in America. Lucky us!

Here are a few pictures from our trip...

Bella on farfar's motorcycle

Our second honeymoon

The storm of the year in Denmark.. lots of flooding

Cousins

Local ice-cream shop

Lindenborg Castle

Bella and Olivia in front of the cottage

Myself and my mother in-law.. 2 educators learning history.

Fastelavn (a bit like Halloween)

Aaahhh the food... it was always fresh from the garden!

Counting down!

After 4 weeks of reading, relaxing, spending time with family and enjoying the lovely rain here in Denmark, it is time to say "farvel". Tonight we are heading to Copenhagen for dinner with friends. The restaurant is nestled in a cobbled stone side street with the most amazing french cuisine. I have butterflies twirling in my stomach just thinking about the 5 course meal.

As much fun as it's been to experience europe, i am excited to get back to America and enjoy all the guilty pleasures of the united states. And to run... run far in the mountains of Utah.

See you soon C!!

Denmark: Day 19

Withdrawls from...

Internet
Cheeseburgers
Insect free home
A bath
The Today Show
Starbucks Coffee

19 days in the danish country side.

Time to come home.

9 days and counting.

8 miles of therapy

I woke up Wednesday morning very sore from Tuesdays CrossFit class. Deadlifts every 30 seconds for 15 minutes. I decided to take it easy and just go for a relaxing run in the forest. An hour, maybe two, i didn't want to think about time. I felt as if i had all the time in the world. I can't remember the last time i said that to myself.

If there is one thing you learn while living in Denmark it is all about the weather. When the sun shines you enjoy it, because the next 5 days could be filled with gray clouds and alot of rain. So i didn't waste any time, as it was a sunny 75 degree evening. I took a beautiful run through the forest alone. It was a little spooky at first but after the first few miles i got used to it.


I had a few things on my mind and a few things i wanted to work out while i ran. I have been battleing a few issues that had been on my mind and i wanted to see how i reacted after a few miles. My mind wondered and then it came. I ran fast as i could up hills, i sprinted down streams, pushed harder and harder until i felt a release of anger and self doubt. Then i started to well up with tears in my eyes. I said a little prayer. On the lines of, " Help me find a way", and then ran in peace the rest of the way home.

Have you ever had such a run? It's better than therapy.

I ended my run with a few turns onto a small windy trail, up a long grassy hill, and over a few sparkling streams. I ended up at the Baroness's castle again and then turned around and found a different path home.

I felt like i had done my job for the universe that day -and it was simply taking care of myself.

CrossFit in Denmark

The witch burning night was a big hit. I couldn't stop saying hello to everyone. "Oh it's you!" and "Oh my gosh i remember you!!" It was just like old times. In short, we burned the witch, had some great food, and sang a few songs. My first Sankt Hans Aften in 5 years. It was just as  i imagined.

Another thing just as i imagined... CrossFit in Denmark.

I had not heard from the CrossFit owner so, i was unsure about just showing up to a class. But it had been about a week since i had been to CrossFit in Utah and i was going stur crazy. So it just so happend the kids were with their grandparents and i fumbled around the house and thought, "it's now or never." I took a bus into Roskilde (the nearest big town from our village) and showed up at the CrossFit doorstep.

As any CrossFit would do in the world, they opened their arms like i was one of their own. I walked in front of a big desk, and aked for the owner. We arranged a free class, and if i liked it i could sign up and if not, i could just leave it at that. Lucky for me, i loved it! I can't remember the last time i sweat so much in my life. The humitity must be very high here because it feels like working out in the amazon jungle.

I am very pleased with the world right now. There are people out there that are welcoming, caring, smiling, and just plain old nice. Coming into a new enviroment and a new country is hard, but danes make it so comfortable and easy.

It's a small world after all.

Jetlag... What's that?

It's like coming home. Right when i stepped off the plane, i could smell, see, feel, taste, that i was home. It's an odd feeling to have after living here so long, and then being gone for 2 years. But it truely is as if i had never left. The rickity straw topped roofs are still the same. The old gas station is still at the corner, and the trees and wheat fields are still strategically placed around the 500 year old village. It is comforting, constant and unchanging.

Enough of that nonsense... onto my first run in Denmark.

Totally blew my mind! I woke up this morning feeling no jetlag what so ever. I toppled down the wooden stairs and saw freshly made danish pancakes and homemade jam. I had made a running agreement the night before with my cousin (really it's my mother and father in-laws foster son) but i just call him cousin Marco. Anyway he heard i enjoyed running, and he was bored (arn't all 19 year olds bored??) and he desperatly wanted to go running with me. So after breakfast we discussed where we would go on our first run. I shouted out, "the forest!"



Baroness's Castle

The danish forests have always been a place of peace and refuge for me. So the forest it is. From our tiny village, we ran on the hard cement bike path for 2 miles before we hit the entrance to the forest. Immediatley when we entered in the cool green trees, i felt light. Just like when i run in Utah's mountains. I get this sense of balance, kind of like this is where i am suppose to be. 

It was breathtaking. I felt like i was in a movie. Braveheart, The Other Bolyn Girl, First Knight.. i could go on and on. Knowing i was running in such an old and medival sight, gave me a mysterious feeling. Feeling the soft mud push against my shoes and the brush of the trees against my legs were perfection at it's finest. I could have ran all day. We ran up hills, through fields, up to the Baroness and Baron's castle, through the streets of a small viking town and then finally down the bike path past the fjord. We ran 16 kilometers, which equals about 10 miles. I couldn't have choosen a better run and a better day if i tried.

Now, a quick shower and then off to burn witches! It's a big day in Denmark. It is Sankt Hans Aften tonight. In the heathen days, they burned real witches, but now it's just an exuse to throw a big party with all the villagers. We have a big bon fire, eat, sing and dance. We actually burn a fake witch too.

Sankt Hans Aften

 The adventure continues..

Here we come.... Europe!

We leave for europe in 2 days!!! I cannot contain my excitment. I call it "Europe" becasue it sounds alot more exotic than just plain old "Denmark".

Weeks before i decided to run a marathon, I planned a weekend trip to Rome. Instead i got a trip to the transmission shop which took all my Roman coins. Boo hoo, sniffle, sniffle.

So now it's just Denmark. My mother-in-law says she has a surprise trip planned but she won't tell me. I have a feeling it might be Sweden or Germany. Any how, i'll take 4 quiet weeks in Denmark anytime.

Bon' voyage and have a great summer everyone. I WILL still blog while i'm in Denmark so don't be dismayed. It might be a once a weeker, but i'll still keep in touch.

After all, don't you want to know how my runs go in Denmark??

Denmark 2009

Click here to view these pictures larger

I am officially apart of the marathon club :)

It was thee most beautiful run i have ever taken -almost spiritual. It was indescribable.
The first 13 miles were not very pleasant, but the last 13 were magical.
Here are the sorted details...

Mile 1-5 Ran with my brother-in-law the first 5. We were going at a 8:30 minute mile pace and he said, we have to slow down or we will crash at the end. So, we slowed to an 8:50 pace.

Mile 7 I had to release all that water i'd been gulping. Broke off from my brother-in-law and waited 4 minutes to go to the bathroom. I'm upset that i wasted the time.

Mile 7 I take a GU and some water, then start feeling sick. Severe stomach pains and i loose my rythym. Now it's time for the hills.... with stomach cramping. Great!

Mile 8-11 Pain, pain, pain. I can't shake these stomach cramps. I walk through mile 11 aid station and then they finally stop.

Mile 11-12 I've got this! I'm feeling on top of the world. I get a good pace going. I take my second GU.

Mile 13 Oh no! A familiar feeling...blister. It growing, rubbing....i have to get this thing bandaged up. I wasted 6 minutes at an aid station bandaging my blister. I'm off again!

Mile 14 Feel amazing.... i zone out the pain.

Mile 14-21 I need to get through the rest of this freakin' canyon to see the girls and hubby at mile 22. I push it a little more. This feels good.

Mile 22 I see the girls and hubby. A quick hug and then off to the finish line.

Mile 22-25 I am focused, i have a good pace. I feel no pain... it's lost in the music.

Mile 26 I can see the holy grail.... the finish line. I got this! I start a fast sprint to the finish line. I finish in 4:20.

Pain i enjoyed! Where do i sign up for the next one?? :)

I'm thinking Rock in' Roll LasVegas Marathon in December with I Have Run.

Care to join us??

Danger ahead??

Everything is happeing so fast. My head is spinning and i'm trying to get everything in control. New things are in the works and it's messing with my head right before the big day.

I had this eutopia status that everything would be perfect the week leading up to the marathon but i am starting to see alot of disturbing things...

1. Self doubt (I am prepared -Am i?, I've trained for this -Have i?, You can get under 4-Can i walk half way?)

2. More time on my hands to "think" (not a good thing for Farrah who overthinks everything anyway).

3. New opportunities which means big dicisions

4. Distractions (both little and big)

5. My beautiful summer girls screaming, "I'm bored!", every 10 minutes

This is not my perfect week right before the marathon but what can you do?
It is what it is and you either let it bother you or you just go with the flow.

I'm a' flowin'.

Only 7 days until the big day!

I feel like a little kid before Christmas morning.

Then i get this knott in my stomach and think "am i prepared for this?"
26.2 miles is a beast, and in 7 days i am going to tame it.
I have two goals in mind. My first, 3:50. If i can't make that, then anything below 4:10.

I talked to my edurance trainer and she said, keep doing CrossFit but don't push. Back off a little and don't give it your all this week. Conserve energy, repair muscles, relax.

Here is my self-made week before marathon plan

Sunday: Church -pray to the holy lord above for endurance, speed, and peace.
Monday: CrossFit and Protein Load (45%) WATER
Tuesday: CrossFit, CrossFit endurance and Protein Load (45%) WATER

Wednesday: CrossFit, light and easy 3 miles, Protein Load (75%) WATER

Thursday: Rest day and Protein Load (100%) WATER
Friday: Morning sprints (25 minutes) then Carb Load all day baby! Olive garden here i come! Alot of WATER mixed with electrolytes.
Saturday: Race Day! Protein shake, Peanut Butter and jelly sandwich, then a lara bar on the bus.

Any tips for my first marathon. And if ONE more person says, "just have fun", i am going to kill them. :)

My first kipping

If only that was my stomach!!!

After my little scare with my foot/ankle i really have been taking it easy.
I had a complete 24 hour rest and then had Muscle Works take a look at it. Stacey my therapist said it might have been my shoe string that was irritating it.

It paid off and now i have no pain, no problems and even managed to get a 4 mile run in and an amazing CrossFit class.

Every CF class is amazing, but this one was particularly special. After 8 weeks of seeing everyone do a kipping pull-up (even grandma Grace beside me), I DID ONE!
I finally did one -and it rocked! With the marathon only 10 days away, i needed that.

One more thing... i have pre-race jitters already. My stomach is a mess. How do you get rid of that?

The unexpected

This has been an amazing running week. I tempo-ed, i speed-eded (is that a word?), i slow runned, i CrossFitted, i did it all. All in all i hit 38 miles. My highest yet. Memorial Day weekend i did a 18 miler and it was soooo wonderful to know my body is capable of going that distance.

After all my marathon is only 12 days away, so why not push hard, right?

Wrong! Double wrong. Pushing hard right before a race is plain stupid.
I didn't listen and now i am paying for it.

Yep the dreaded "I" word : Injury.

At mile 15 on my 18 miler i felt a strange pain on top of my foot/ankle. I stopped and loosened up my shoelace but it kept on bugging me. It forced me to change my stride and i really struggled to run comfortably those last 3 miles. I made it to mile 18 and called it a day.

When i got home i iced and elevated my foot, but it was still pretty tender. Today it feels better but no running, CrossFitting, jumping or sneezing until this thing is all gone.

What could it be? A pulled tendon, the begining of a stress fracture? And more importantly what if it does go away and then resurfaces on marathon day. I don't think i could continue running with that kind of pain. I can't stand the thought of not finishing.

My Own Calcutta today: Don't let the fear of the unknown chase you down.